• Posted by deann-r on March 27, 2018 at 11:51 am

    Maybe it’s the same for folks without disabilities, but I can never get really enthused about family gatherings around the holidays.  First, most holidays seem to revolve around food.  I have a feeding tube so that’s kind of a bummer.  Even before the feeding tube it took me longer to eat and was awkward.  Then if there’s a large crowd it’s difficult to maneuver, so I usually just park it.  I’m not much of a huger either. Especially with the germ factor.  In the end the day is usually pleasant but that’s about the extent of it.  Any tips to make a family gathering more enjoyable?

    kevin-schaefer replied 5 years, 11 months ago 2 Members · 3 Replies
  • 3 Replies
  • kevin-schaefer

    Member
    March 27, 2018 at 12:22 pm

    I get what you’re saying here. The holidays can be overwhelming for anyone, but especially for people with disabilities it can add an extra layer of stress.

    For me, I definitely relate to having trouble maneuvering my chair when there’s so many people at our house for Thanksgiving and Christmas. I generally get settled at the table early, and then after we eat and kind of spread out, I usually go back in my room with my cousin and watch movies or something. But when everyone first gets there and we’re all crowded in the kitchen, I do feel like I’m in the way.

    Then, something else that kind of annoys me moreso now is that it’s become harder for me to relate to a lot of people in my family. The people in my age group -my siblings and cousins- are either married, engaged or in serious relationships. I’m not in any way bitter about this and I’m very happy for all of them, but it just seems like the big points of discussion at every family get together are about relationships, weddings, family life, etc. I love my family, but I’m just at a different point in my life and I have other things that I’m focused on and passionate about. I also don’t really want the “traditional” family and work life. I’m very passionate about my career and my writing, and I’d rather go to comic cons and pop-culture events than focus on raising a family. Being a spouse and parent is of course very admirable in my mind, but it’s just not on my radar right now.

    So yeah, I definitely get what you’re saying. I’m not sure I have any concrete advice, but I would say that there’s nothing wrong with taking some time to yourself during big family get togethers. It’s not rude, and if you feel overwhelmed I say just take a break or go off with just one or two family members.

    Thanks for bringing this up!

  • deann-r

    Member
    April 1, 2018 at 9:24 pm

    Survived another holiday!  Well, I can’t say that for another week or however long it takes for the incubation of a cold to pass.  2/3 of my family have some variation of a cold, and we decided to play Telestrations.  It’s a combination of the games Telephone and Pictionary.  Fun, yes, but I can’t help thinking of germ exposure as each notebook gets passed down the line.  Hopefully the hand sanitizer killed 99.9% of the germs and the other .1% was not contagious.  If you are looking for a family game this is a fun one.  You don’t even have to be a good artist because the worse you are the funnier the game becomes.

    • kevin-schaefer

      Member
      April 8, 2018 at 12:00 pm

      Glad it went well! And hope you didn’t catch anything. Sounds like you were careful, so hopefully everything will be fine. And thanks for the game recommendation!

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