What Eric Dane’s passing reminded me about living with SMA
I know life is fragile, but that's not an easy reality to accept
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Some losses don’t give you time to prepare.
The sudden passing of Eric Dane, a Hollywood icon who couldn’t escape the ugly grip of amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS), is one of them. It’s the kind of news that doesn’t just make you sad. It unsettles you. It pulls something deeper to the surface, something you don’t always want to sit with. Because it’s not just about who he was — it’s about how quickly everything can change.
One moment, someone is here, living, speaking, and reflecting on their life. The next, they’re gone. No warning. No gradual goodbye. Just gone. And that kind of loss hits differently when you’re already aware of life’s fragility.
A difficult truth to process
Living with spinal muscular atrophy (SMA) means I’ve never had the luxury of believing I have unlimited time. That awareness has always existed in the background of my life. Sometimes it’s loud, and sometimes it fades into something quieter. But it’s always there.
Still, I’m human. I fall into the same patterns as everyone else. I catch myself assuming there will be more time. More time to say what I really mean, to show up fully, to do the things that matter most. And then something like this happens, shattering that illusion all over again.
Watching the Netflix special “Famous Last Words: Eric Dane” made it feel even more real. There was something deeply human about the way Dane spoke — reflective, open, grounded in his experiences. It didn’t feel like someone at the end of their story. It felt like someone still living it.
That’s what makes his death so hard to process.
Because life doesn’t always give us the chance to finish what we started, there isn’t always closure. There isn’t always a “right time” to say the things we’ve been holding on to. Sometimes, things end, and we’re left carrying the weight of everything we thought we had time for.
Living with SMA has forced me to sit with that reality more often than most. Not in a dramatic, constant way, but in quiet, everyday moments. In the awareness of my body. In the unpredictability of my health. In the understanding that there are things I can’t control, no matter how much I try.
But resilience, for me, has never meant ignoring that truth. It means living with it. It means waking up each day knowing there are uncertainties I can’t escape and choosing to move forward anyway. Not perfectly, not fearlessly, but honestly.
Because the truth is, resilience doesn’t always look like strength. Sometimes, it looks like grief or frustration. Sometimes, it looks like sitting in silence, trying to make sense of something that doesn’t make sense. And sometimes, it looks like continuing to show up when you’re fully aware of how fragile everything is.
SMA didn’t create that reality in my life. It just made me aware of it sooner.
Dane’s passing reminds me that this fragility isn’t limited to people with serious health conditions like ALS or SMA. It’s not something that belongs only to the disability community. It belongs to all of us.
We are all living without guarantees. We are all moving through life assuming there will be more time until something happens that forces us to realize there might not be. The difference is that some of us are forced to confront that truth earlier. But knowing it doesn’t make it easier; it just makes it harder to ignore.
So I’ve had to ask myself a question I don’t always want to answer: What does it mean to live when you know time isn’t promised?
For me, it means being more intentional in my everyday life. It means saying what I feel while I still can. It means being present, even on the days that feel heavy. It means not waiting for the “right time” to live my life. Because the truth is, the right time isn’t something we’re guaranteed.
This loss didn’t teach me anything new. It reminded me of something I sometimes try to forget: Life is fragile. Time is not promised. And resilience isn’t about pretending otherwise. It’s about learning how to live with that truth and choosing to keep going anyway.
Note: SMA News Today is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of SMA News Today or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to spinal muscular atrophy.
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