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On Elevating Your Cool Status When You Have a Disability
This is one of my favorite columns I’ve written for SMA News Today: https://smanewstoday.com/2018/11/06/sma-on-being-cool-when-youre-wheelchair-bound-halloween/?amp
I sometimes find myself struggling with how people perceive me, on account of all the disability stereotypes that are still prevalent today. We’ve talked about the whole “inspiration porn” concept before, and it really does feel like there are people who think people in wheelchairs are perfect little angels. I wanted to write about this, and explore the concept of disability as something that’s cool.
Can any of you relate? Let me know in the comments.
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6 Replies
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I care about how people perceive my character. That’s important, and something I have control over. If people think I’m a cool person, that’s good I guess. But I don’t care about being cool in terms of appearance. I don’t think I’m necessarily even bad looking, but let’s face it, I’m probably not going to be perceived as cool from an appearance standpoint, and that’s fine with me.
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Well, I was more referring to character and attitude in this column. I was trying to get across the idea of accepting our disability as a part of us, rather than something we’re afraid of or dread. Disability itself can be cool, and that’s the concept I wanted to explore here, and do so through a humorous lens.
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How to be cool with our disability,well I m comunicative man and if I m in walk and someone even that is preson that I don t know him passing by my I usually greet him,if I see my neighours no matter is he or she young or old I stop with them and I talk a little.And I like to joke about girls,sex,other things,and in that way I try to show people that I m not sad man because I m ill.
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Having a sense of humor, being real and exhuding confidence is what I’ve found brings on the cool. I’m a mental health clinician and work in a confinement setting with incarcerated juveniles. These kids are as tough as they come but I have managed to become totally cool in their eyes. For example, I have hard core, 3rd generation “gang bangers” drawing pictures for and of me, holding doors, running up to give me a hug and telling their peers what a “cool” counselor I am. What I believe makes me so “cool” in their eyes is my ability to be kind, to listen, to be truthful and to do it all with a smile, a sense of humor and a willingness to be totally open about my disability, vulnerability and all. Usually within the first few minutes of meeting one of the kids, the questions start coming…”Why do you ride that? Can you walk? How fast does that go?” I answer all their question with full honesty and throw jokes in about the pathetic sound of my scooter horn and the millions of time I have run over people’s feet. By the end of our time together I have a “cool” rating of 10 and they have plans to hook my scooter up with a nitrous system!
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That’s awesome! Sounds like a great career. Like DeAnn, I’d be interested in learning more about how you got into this field. One of our other columnists here at SMA News Today is in grad school to become a psychiatrist, and she writes a lot about mental health issues. Thanks for sharing.
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Totally agree with you! My nieces think I’m cool just because of how I interact with them. They could care less that I’m in a chair.
Sounds like you have an awesome job. If you don’t mind my asking, how did you get into that field of work?