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Managing Expectations
Hope everyone had a great Fourth! I wanted to bring up the topic of managing expectations. This is an important skill for everyone, but I believe it is even more crucial for SMA people as we often have such minimal control over things. It is easy to cling to whatever control we do have which can easily lead to letdowns. These letdowns can be as minor as having plans to go get a coffee be derailed, or as life changing as having plans to move in with a friend fall through. I have learned (the hard way in some cases) to hold pretty much everything loosely so I don’t become massively upset when something doesn’t work out. However, I don’t want to go around assuming nothing good will ever happen, because then I am basically miserable all the time. I think I have succeeded in finding some middle ground, but this is still something I struggle with. It’s a bit of a dilemma. What strategies have you guys developed for managing your expectations?
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4 Replies
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Incredibly frustrating to say the least. Most people think I’m fairly easy going. Sometimes it’s just because I have to be. Usually I have a plan a, b and c. I also don’t give up easily. Over the years I’ve learned to accept and realize my limitations, yet still push the boundaries if that makes sense. Basically I try to do what I can until I can’t, then try to move on.
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Yep. Just gotta do the best you can with what you have.
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Yeah I agree with DeAnn. It’s definitely frustrating when you’re making plans and the tiniest thing can ruin them. Like she said though, you don’t want to set a low bar for yourself either. Set high goals and push your limits as much as possible. If I hadn’t pushed my limits I wouldn’t have a college degree, a full-time job, an active social life and a high level of independence. It’s hard at first, but I’m a firm believer in taking risks when you need to and aiming high.
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Ryan, what you say makes a lot of sense. While we would love to have full control over every situation that affects us, like you, I have learned that disappointment sometimes follows us because of our inability to do something on the physical side to make this an achievable task. While I try to temper my expectations, knowing that I may not be able to control the situation as much as I would like to, I’m also one of those type of people who look at the glass as being half-full instead of being half empty.
This is a very delicate subject, one that must be individualized so that everyone can deal with it on a personal level.
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